After much careful consideration, I have realized what America's most pressing problem is: contact with foreigners and foreign nations. In order to solve this plan, I have devised the AMaster Plan For Homeland Security. The plan consists of several related points:

point A: To secure America's Northern border, Canada will be annexed.

point B: To secure America's Southern border, nuclear blasting charges will be used to create a 40 mile ocean buffer with Mexico.

point C: To secure freedom for all Americans, an airtight, impenetrable dome will be erected around America.

point D: To prevent further deterioration of America's natural resources, immediate conversion to hydrogen fuel cells as a source of power will take place

point E: To prevent a breach of the unbreachable dome, approximately 30,000 SAM launchers and 60,000 AAA guns will be installed on the dome's outer surface. These will destroy any aircraft which approach within 200 miles.

point F:To prevent amphibious invasion, 100,000 artillery and missile launchers will be installed on the outer surface, and will destroy any ship approaching within 40 miles.

point G: To insure that no one penetrates the impenetrable dome, 10,000,000 people will be drafted, and ordered to conduct continous march around the expanded border.

point H: To discourage any attempts to breach the unbreachable dome, a doomsday device will be created. See Dr. Strangelove for further details.

It is my belief that taking these steps will secure Freedom, Liberty, and Justic for all Americans until the sun goes nova.

Questions? Comments? (Constructive) Criticism?

You should get the Nobel Peace Price Award for your work AMaster. Outstanding work :D:D

Point I: Take the north american continent and rip it out of the earth and cruise the universe in a gigantic land cruiser;)

Hmm, flying cita... err continent. Scary if it flies over Europe. :D

Regarding Point I:
Be careful where you land that thing. (And please mind the Big Ben as you drift by...). And ...um... good luck finding a parking space... :D

Is there a way to get in and out of the dome? How would America get the stuff they have to import from europe and asia into america?

how would they breathe if it is airthight? Does America have enough forrests to be self sufficient in terms of Oxygen?

What about plumbing? :D

Ara
(Having a tootache and thus being extremely annoyed)

One thing worries me. How do I breath? I know we dont have enought forest for that. Why dont all Americans just go around in a titanum bubble? Wait! Thats a good idea.

point I: All Americans must wear a titanum bubble.

Rather nice post. It might just happen. I'd love to see the US fly. It would make the sea much bigger and the sea level would go down alot.

Christopher_Lee, yes, we have enough forests and plantlife here to be Oxygen sustained. We will have plenty of O2 in your plan because we are no longer using combustion, but Hydrogen fuel cells. :p

Hmm... a British friend of mine recently proposed Point C as a standalone solution... ;)

AFAIK, most of the oxygen you breathe are produced by bacteria and fungi in sea waters, not by the forests.

[This message has been edited by Invoker (edited May 16, 2002).]

You might have enough forests, but if the dome is inpenetrable, then there wont be any sunlight for photosynthesis. Good bye America :D :p.

(In Grandpa Simpson voice) The easiest solution is to kill everyone, that way, there won't be anyone left to complain...

ah, but it is a TRANSPARENT impenetrable dome. Such wonders of science are only possible in this greatest of nations that we call the United States of America. and as for oxygen, we'll have all of Canada's forests to supply that.

and no, other than light, nothing can get by. The defenses are there just as insurance.

Surely if it is transparant, it's going to be pretty easily penetrable, considering most materials that are transparant, e.g. glass are easily breakable. :)



[This message has been edited by Wildfire (edited May 17, 2002).]

as previously stated, such scientific miracles are only possible in the bastion of democracy that is America

The dome doesnt have to let light in. Their are lights that create the same effects as the sun that work in doors. I've seen them. The way their were growing plants with them was very weird. But anys sunlight is not a problem.

[This message has been edited by DragonRider SkyWard (edited May 17, 2002).]

We're going to use transparent aluminum.

Or we could have Zarathinwhateverhisnameish knit an aluminum ring maille cover for the US, because it's the strongest material in the universe, and able to wihtstand any abuse.

We have found that you are wrong Damona. And don't make fun of Zarakinthish, he's a great guy who knows a helleva lot more about maille than you.

[This message has been edited by Z-Layrex (edited May 18, 2002).]

Or we could have Zarathinwhateverhisnameish knit an aluminum ring maille cover for the US, because it's the strongest material in the universe, and able to wihtstand any abuse.

Damona, well I could make ya a depleted uranium shirt instead, but I think the dex penalty might be a little too heavy, so the whole expansion dream might not work that well anymore :p but withstand abuse, no problem =)

point A: Some of us ARE canadian you know, and until I move to the US, I will be a proud canadian. Canada is *way* better off without the USA taking over.
All the rest of the points are hilarious. And by the air. Air?! What about AIR?! ;)

Shadow Goddes, yes I realize there are Canadians here. There are probably Mexicans as well, and I'm sure they don't appreciate their country being nuked to create an oceanic barrier. Which brings us to...

Point Z: take NONE of this seriously.

/me has to laugh

Aluminum. Hehe. Prove to me (With chemistry, physics, and documented fact, not testimony from a Ren-Fair actor and opinion.) that I am wrong, and I will agree. Until then, my stance is that while aluminum might be light, durable, and shiny, it does not make effective working armor.

Knows more about maille than me. Possibly, but I doubt it. Anyone that claims to play video games over 100 hours a week most likely knows little else than video games.

I have said my piece, and I won't pick on him anymore. I don't want to get into a fight with the aluminum maille jewlery maker or his fans.:heh::rolleyes:

How dare you!
You don't have a bloody clue what i do with my time, i told you that as a joke. I do play games alot, but i also consider myself a reasonablly smart person in certain areas. And face it zarakin can smash you at maille any day, i don't see you entering any competitions. Go on, enter the same one as zarakin, we'll see what happens :evil:

PM PM PM PM... Can you take the hint?

I already took the hint, before you mentioned it. I agree, this had gotten way outta hand.

I think it is a good idea! Although i would like to make:
Point J: All my friends in America are allowed to penetrate the inpenertratatably domey thingy so they can see me. Especially Shralp who will one day take me as his Apprentice in the ways of MATURE comedy.

[Tsk, tsk. Go read the forum rules. No personal attacks will be tolerated.] -Tal

[This message has been edited by Taluntain (edited May 18, 2002).]

I thought it was a personal compliment, Taluntainy. So nice to have a cute little British fan. Makes me wish ClubMonkee were back so I could set her up with Poodle.

On the armor question (what was the original topic?), aluminum is pretty strong, but I have no idea who'd think it's stronger than steel -- or depleted uranium for that matter. Lokken, try checking around Extremist's area for DP rounds. I hear we left a lot of them over there.

On the topic: America doesn't need a big dome or any oceanic barriers. We're just going to take the rest of the world over with McDonald's restaurants and Coca-cola. Patience, my brethren.

AluminIUM would be a rubbish shield. I have broken several bike frames made of aluminIUM. It is lighter than steel, but much much weaker. You can melt many of its alloys with a bunsen burner, which both the Canadiens and Mexicans might have...

I;m not entirely sure about the fungi/bacteria in the water producing all the O2 in the air. they probably produce all the O2 in the water, it sounds like a logging firm/Bushism to me...

"aluminum" hahahahahahahahaha :):):):):):):)

Glad to see I'm not the only one that finds humor in aluminum.

um Bateluer, seeing as how oxygen is consumed as a reactant for hydrogen fuel cells, the US would be forced to use very little energy in order to allow its citizens to breathe!

:aluminIum:

Stick to the topic, people.

Can we nuke the politicians when we separate from South America? It might make the continent more hospitable. If we can't then we should make them walk post on the dome.

America is perfect in every way possible and because we spell it "aluminum" it means its the only and correct spelling America is so good I hate Canada and Europe

you all stink
and are also smelly

(you better not take this seriously)

It's not just McD's and Coca-Cola, though...the Yanks have other weapons at their disposal:

http://www.theonion.com/onion3709/starbucks_phase_two.html

Enjoy..

That one really cracked me up!

Yeah...that's easily my second favorite site...I take a trip through the archives whenever I need a pick-me-up...

What's your favorite site?

Um, that would be SP... :borg:

Mine, too!