View Full Version : More evidence that Episode III is going to suck?!?!?


Sir Belisarius
Mon, 24th May '04, 11:40am
I read this on Sci Fi wire today, can it be that George has totally run out of creative ideas?!?!? I mean come on! What about:

Episode III: The Fall of the Jedi
Episode III: The Rise of Vader

Anything is batter than:
Star Wars Episode III: The Birth of the Empire????????????? (http://www.scifi.com/scifiwire/art-rumors.html?2004-05/19/09.00.rumors)

Big B
Wed, 26th May '04, 12:43am
It's only May. It's still a year out from opening. I seriously, seriously doubt that is the title anymore than Return of the Jedi was Blue Harvest and Attack of the Clones was The Sith Strike Back. AOTC was announced as the title the September before the May release. I would expect a similar case for Episode III. And trust me, if Attack of the Clones can fly as a Star Wars title, just about anything can.

Shazamdude
Wed, 26th May '04, 12:48am
The only evidence I need that Ep. III is going to suck are Episodes 1 & 2. I'll still go see it for some reason, though. Probably some deep-seated masochistic tendencies. I don't think I got enough love as a child.

Faerus Stoneslammer
Wed, 26th May '04, 6:20am
I don't think it sounds any worse than "Attack of the Clones"...or "the Phantom Menace" for that matter...and anyways, I'm more than a tad suspicious of the source...the tabloids? Not exactly what I'd call "quality reporting"...

:yot: Wow!! Sir Bel actually managed to bring Big B out of hiding (shouldn't *really* surprise me...this is a Star Wars topic after all... :p )

Sir Belisarius
Wed, 26th May '04, 10:56am
It is good to see another SW fan haunting the boards again! Another title someone mentioned in the office yesterday was:

Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

That sounds pretty cool, doesn't it?

I was also watching SW fan movies on Atomfilms.com last night. Did anyone here see "Pink Five?" It's actually pretty funny! You can find it here:
Luke, Leia, Chewie....Stacie?!?!? (http://www.theforce.net/theater/shortfilms/pinkfive/index.shtml)

Rallymama
Wed, 26th May '04, 1:18pm
Don't lend too much credence to rumors of titles this far in advance. I have a promo poster for a little flick that you might remember... "Revenge of the Jedi."

And, yes, it's likely to suck. Phantom Menace sucked so badly that we never bothered to see Clones, and that'll be a hard trend to break. Maybe someday when it comes on free TV...

Should they ever be produced, I'm not the slightest bit interested in Eps 7, 8, and 9 - unless of course they're produced by someone else.

Sir Belisarius
Wed, 26th May '04, 1:43pm
If they do 7, 8 & 9 based on the Timothy Zahn series starting with "Heir to the Empire." I think I'd go see them. Anything else, I wouldn't be interested in...But there's no way they'll make those - Mark Hamil, Carrie Fisher, and Harrison Ford are all waaaaay too old now!!

Apeman
Wed, 26th May '04, 1:50pm
A new Hope
The empire strikes back
Return of the jedi
Phantom Menace
Attack of the clones.

Birth of the Empire.


Now tell me Bel, are you seriously going to tell me that the last title is that much cheesier than the previous :rolleyes: brilliant :rolleyes: titles.

Don't get me wrong, I like the movies too but come on every title is as worse as it can get.

Aldazar
Thu, 27th May '04, 7:26am
Birth Of The Empire has a nice ring to it.

How about "The Death of The Jedi"??

Or The Death of Jar Jar Binks?

Lazy Bonzo
Thu, 27th May '04, 6:39pm
'Death of Jar Jar Binks' has a nice ring to it lol. Though it would be clear evidence of Lucas finally giving in and apoligising for Episode 1 lol.

Septic Yogurt
Sat, 29th May '04, 11:52pm
Star Wars: EPISODE THREE: Anakin Vs. Obi Wan

I hope i'm kidding myself.

Sir Belisarius
Mon, 31st May '04, 10:32pm
'Death of Jar Jar Binks' has a nice ring to it lol. Though it would be clear evidence of Lucas finally giving in and apoligising for Episode 1 lol.Maybe I'm giving Lucas too much credit for adding subtlety to his films, but after 'Attack of the Clones' I think Lucas more than made up for the bumbling Jar Jar of Episode I; Jar Jar Binks calling for the Galactic Senate vote to give Palpatine emergency powers that will eventually give rise to the EMPIRE. Personally, I thought that was a stroke of genius!

Morgoth
Mon, 31st May '04, 10:54pm
Jar Jar is gonna die? sweet :p

Hmmm..
How about:
Episode III: Help!! My name is Manuel and I am being held hostage at the Skywalker Ranch!!

Sir Belisarius
Wed, 16th Jun '04, 11:03am
Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith Thank god it's not being called "Birth of the Empire!!!!!

A better than hoped for title... (http://www.scifi.com/scifiwire/art-main.html?2004-06/15/10.30.film)

nior
Wed, 16th Jun '04, 11:27am
How about :

The Return of Saruman... Err, Count Douko or
Yoda Bids Farewell or
Bye-bye Mace Windu (sounds like MS-Windows) or
Hello, Darth Vader or
Welcome to the Empire

:D

Takara
Wed, 16th Jun '04, 2:28pm
How about "The special effects strike back" or "The special effect take over" Or something to that effect?

I mean, episode 2 seem to try to cover up gaping plot inconsistancies and a shabby storyline, by trying to dazzle everyone with HUGE effects bonanzas.

[ June 16, 2004, 16:44: Message edited by: Takara ]

The Kilted Crusader
Wed, 16th Jun '04, 2:52pm
I can't believe at how much I want to slap George Lucas for making the new films. I never used to, I think SP has corrupted me :D ;) :p

Wildfire
Wed, 16th Jun '04, 3:08pm
I think it looks rather awesome. Just take a look at this trailer (http://www.kontrabandcontent.co.uk/graphics/movies/riseoftheempire1.mov) that came out for it the other day.

Gehn
Wed, 16th Jun '04, 6:31pm
There really shouldn't be such pandemonium over Star Wars film titles. I mean I can understand why, but ALL SW film titles are cheesy. They can't be anything BUT cheesy cliches of themselves. All of them are, technically speaking, devoid of imagination. Right from "A new hope" to "Attack of the clones." Addmitedly AOTC was a tad worse than the others, but if you are a SW fan, you expect such titles. They are part and parcel of a SW movie. In fact, you even begin to like them for their cheesiness :D So I personally don't care what the new one is called. I just hope the actual film won't be as bad as "The Phantom Menace."

And after seeing Episode II, i'm hoping it III can restore some faith. Episode II was by no means perfect, far from it, but it was a DEFINITE improvement on Episode I. So hopefully III will be right on track.

Sir Belisarius
Wed, 16th Jun '04, 10:15pm
Wildfire, that trailer was awesome!!!!!!

Wordplay
Thu, 17th Jun '04, 2:13pm
It was just a rumour; the name can be anything when they officially publish it. :rolleyes:

Apeman
Thu, 17th Jun '04, 2:26pm
You know Ghen has a point. It's better to have one slightly overrated :rolleyes: starting movie and a slightly better second movie and a whopper of an ending movie.

Than it is to have two super movies and one major dissapointment as an ending movie.


BTW, Lego star wars rule!

Jack Funk
Thu, 17th Jun '04, 8:21pm
Do we need evidence beyond the existence of episodes 1 and 2? :p

BTW - about Lego Star Wars. I work with a guy who has the X-Wing and Star Destroyer Lego models in his cubicle at work. We call him Lego Doug.

Lego Doug builds the Star Destroyer (http://www.wilcoxusa.net/stardestroyer/)

I'm in one of these pics. At the bottom of the page, on the right, with my back to the camera:
Lego Doug brings it to work (http://www.wilcoxusa.net/stardestroyer/page_08.htm)

Harbourboy
Thu, 17th Jun '04, 9:26pm
Holy moly that thing is massive. I bet it cost an arm and a leg. Even the smallest Star Wars lego pack that only has one speeder-bike is too expensive for me.

Firestorm
Mon, 28th Jun '04, 12:15am
I think that both Episode 1 and 2 were extremely bad, and I took offense that films like that can be let out on the open market. But still, Episode 2 was by far the worst. I really hope 3 will be better...

Harbourboy
Mon, 28th Jun '04, 12:25am
Here is one reviewer's (James Berardinelli)defence of The Phantom Menace that he wrote on 22 June 2004:

The Phantom Defence (http://movie-reviews.colossus.net/reelthoughts.html)

I tend to agree with most of his comments that this movie was nowhere near as bad as everyone makes out. I still think Episode III will rock.

Big B
Fri, 23rd Jul '04, 6:16pm
Rather than starting a new topic, I thought this might be a good place to post this:

Matthew Stover, the author for the novelized version of Episode III (Terry Brooks did Episode I, R.A. Salvatore did II) has this to say...

From his official site:

I didn't like the first two Pequel movies when I first saw them. I suppose, like many other fans, I was really hoping for something that would be the Original Trilogy Bigger, Faster, and Louder.

But --

After reading the script for Ep III, I went back and watched I and II again, and they were MUCH more enjoyable to me when I looked at them as parts of an organic whole. There is a real emotional arc to the whole story, and it works for me. I think it's gonna work for nearly all of you, too.

This is what I truly believe: when Ep III comes out, there will be a radical re-evaluation of the first two films, not unlike what I went through.

I really think it's gonna be that good.

LKD
Sat, 24th Jul '04, 2:43am
The first three films had a sweet simplicity to them that rocked, as well as a compelling storyline (note I didn't say perfect storyline, but a good one nonetheless.) The acting rocked and the overall effect was one of wonder -- as a book I once read pointed out, Star Wars is not science fiction, it is mythic fantasy, with the Death Star being the Castle, Vader the Dragon, Luke the Boyish Hero, aided by the Rogue, Han Solo, and guided by a Father-God sort of figure in Kenobi, not to mention the sexy princess in distress.

Is there any of that mythic feel in these last two outings? Not for me there isn't; it got caught up in trying to be realistic politically and relying on computer effects (I find it telling that the effects in "A New Hope" were almost all handcrafted, not computer generated.) I see them because the good stuff shines through on occasion, and because I'm curious as to what old George has in mind as the events before A New Hope.

Harbourboy
Sat, 24th Jul '04, 7:22am
I still loved all five films. Better than most of the dross coming out these days.

Big B
Sun, 25th Jul '04, 6:46pm
OK, it's official. It was announced at ComicCon this weekend. It's Revenge of the Sith. Can't go wrong with that, especially with the nice parallel to Return of the Jedi.

There is some simplicity to the original trilogy, but it's not like it's completely devoid of complexity. In ANH you have Obi-Wan and Vader mysteriously hinting at the past. You have the concept of the Force as well. You have talk of Emperors dissolving the Senate. You have Han, who is neither really a full good guy or a guy out for himself until the end of the film. In ESB, you have the whole "I am your father" twist. You have complexities coming from Yoda and Obi-Wan talking about the past and "that boy is our last hope". And then there's the classic scene right smack dab in the middle of ESB, where the stark lines between good and evil, black and white are decidely blurred, and that's the scene with Luke in the cave on Dagobah. Lando is neither good, nor bad himself. Cue ROTJ, in where Luke constructs a complex plan where he tries to reason and negotitate with Jabba first (the sign of a true Jedi) and then he has to lay the smack down when that doesn't work out. The Emperor's "trap" is just as complex. There is ongoing tension between Vader and Luke each struggling with the light side and dark side within themselves. In fact, when you think about it, the original trilogy is in fact, quite complex. We've just had more time for it to grow on us.

The Irreligious Paladin
Mon, 26th Jul '04, 6:33am
But how complex is Jar Jar supposed tobe? How does Lucas explain the plotline inconsistencies he forced on us from what he alluded about the past in 4,5,6 and the past as shown in 1,2, and (I'msure the trend will continue)3? That's right he doesn't. He is a control freak. He hates that the movies became so huge that they didn't belong tohim anymore, they belong to everyone who loves them, and decided to make them his again. I beleive his plot inconsistencies were concious to let everyone whowasn't George Lucas know who those movies belonged to. We still go to see his movies even though we know they're jerking us around. I hate you George Lucas, I hate your "new" star wars, and I hate that Iwon't be able to resist going to see Episode 3.

Sydax
Wed, 4th Aug '04, 2:02pm
Ever wonder how technology went "backwards" in Star War history? I wonder how Luke and Obi never had that double light laser (or whatever) sabre when in the "past" they exists? I wonder how/when Obi forgot to fight like Bruce Lee...
The new episodes (1 & 2) have too many "romantic" moments; too much "talking moments", adapted, I guess, to the way that movies are made today; the old trilogy is fast, full of action and has a decent (by that time) storyline; I don't know why Lucas made this 2 new episodes so large, I found several times in those movies boring, like "where is the Fast Forward button?".

Big B
Wed, 4th Aug '04, 6:09pm
The progression from the glossy technology of TPM and the parts of AOTC are evolving under necessity of war. This will be shown well in Revenge of the Sith. It makes sense that technology is still good, but resources are more scarce for the Rebels come the time of the OT. Plus, because of it's sheer size, the Empire focuses on resources that are efficient, not necessarily because they have a shiny gloss on them and prettier instrumentation panels. Everything in the galaxy gets banged up during the Clone Wars and the Emperor's reign. That's the point.

At first glance, there may seem to be a discrepency between the amount of time spent of talking and romantic moments as opposed to action moments in the OT vs. the PT, but when put to the test, such is not the case. I once measured in minutes a rough timeline of how much time in each Star Wars movie is spent on action. The results were interesting. I hope to get a more accurate timeline once the SW DVD's come out next month. For example, one thing I noticed was that ANH and TPM had similar amounts of time spent toward action, but the distribution was different. After the initial Rebel Blockade Runner scene in ANH, things don't spice up again until they blast out of Mos Eisley many minutes later (with a short run-in with Tusken Raiders in between.) Well, TPM, has a similar lull spot so to speak, but it's not placed like ANH. It's everything on Tatooine minus the Pod Race and run-in with Darth Maul, and the time spent on Coruscant.

AOTC, ESB, and ROTJ all fall in the same amount of time spent towards action, give or take 5 minutes. I don't have the results with me right now, but like I said I'm timing again, digitally with the DVD's to get an even more accurate assessment shortly.