Came across a Belt of Free Action as a random treasure in Morrowind. I figured it would be great, until I looked at what it did and thought it through. "Cast when Used: Cure Paralyzation on Self" Now tell me, how the heck are you supposed to use this when you're paralyzed? :hahaerr:

And, of course, kudos go to the Boots of Blinding Speed for making it more than just a figure of speech. :shake:

So, what other freaky, freaky items have the rest of you found (in any of the games)? :rolling:

A ring called the "Ring of Health".

Looks good, until I realize it drains health instead of heal.

The Banhammer and Fat Lute (phat lewt *har har*).

Ooh, I just remembered something: a user-submitted enchantment from a FAQ.
"Keeper of the Abyss"
Item - Exquisite Pants
Spell(s) - Water Breathing, Slowfall 1pt, Night Eye 5-6pts
Effects - Constant Effect
Charge - N/A
Contributor - Cerkill Okay, Slowfall I can kind of see, but...Pants of Water Breathing? Pants of Night-Eye? :shake:

Oh oh, just found another item.
In a fishermans shack southwest of Gnaar Mok is a hidden piece of paper. On it, one of most beautiful pieces of one-page literature I've had the pleasure of reading.
The freaky part is that it creates a whole new atmosphere at this abandoned shack, who is this mysterious fisherman and what happened to him?


I am forever swimming around, amidst this ocean world we call home. My limbs grow weak and weary as my eyes drift skyward in defeat. I remember how warm the earth felt, as I lived and breathed next to her beating heart. I remember enough to keep searching through an ocean of tears, raised to astronomical depths. My dreams offer solace, where I return to distant, faded times. Through trees entwined with cool autumn air, my sorrow is lured by fragrant, bittersweet memories. I am at home as much as my world and consciousness allow. I remember falling into the most beautiful lake I've ever experienced. She swallowed me whole, like a droplet, and I was enraptured and enwombed within her bliss. The lonely windswept desert sky of my soul was filled by her luminous stars and warmed by her sunlit radiance. I gazed downward in awe and saw it all reflected in the shimmering ripples dancing and playing about the surface. It appeared to me as real as the very wonders it was reflecting. I stepped forward to prove to no one and everyone that they were, by belief. For an aching instant I was betwixt the two and the summation. Confusion befell me and I fell through, only to realize I hadn't entered the lake, I had left it. With all of my remaining life I howled at the heavens and collapsed, like a star on the shores of my youth, as my life's breath wandered away from the home it had harbored. I have been drowning on dry land ever since.

I lay there, coital, for heaven knows how long. I felt eons ebb and flow in the spans of seconds. I lived as intently as I could in those endless instants, as the boredom of -after- droned on and on. The fires of my heart grew dim and became only the faintest embers of the roaring blaze they had once been. My limbs, heavy with the weight of the world, protested. I felt the longing of this life which slowly began to ease the agony in my heart. As I was gradually nursed back to health, knowledge of record and history tried desperately to fill the yawning, nauseous chasm of my soul. I began to know the deadpan search for freedom and forgetfulness, and I released the hold on my life. Though it still lurched, pained, in front of me, I just stared back with tired, vacant eyes as if watching the most fascinating of nothing. My mind drifted, only to be slammed back reluctantly, repeatedly, and painfully by those I vaguely remember knowing, as if from a different life and age. I try, in vain, to forgive and forget myself as I paste on those plaster smiles and strain to look levelly. I remember. I forget. I forget again. I remember less. I am saddened at the thought that I have forgotten. I am not who I used to be. Though it pained me so, I was never so real as those lonely, lost times of my undoing. I am torn asunder at the thought of losing forever that, which has changed my life eternally, and that which I fear in the depths of my soul will never be again. That, which has gifted me with more pain than I have ever known in all of my lives or all of the lives that I know through my own.

Who am I to ask this of you?


[ August 09, 2006, 16:06: Message edited by: Morgoth ]

Stumbled upon some *pants* of levitation. Whatever.

I believe that's called "hoisting you by your petard". ;) :shake:

Morrowind has a muffin in it, whose purpose escapes me. Oblivion has muffins, cakes, sweetrolls, etc. but they can actually be eaten or used in potion making.

Morrowind has a muffin in it, whose purpose escapes me. Yeah, in the Gro-Bagrat plantation, IIRC. It has no purpose - it has the same effects than bread.

There's another weird area in Morrowind - the Clutter warehouse, where you fight some Argonian named "Lord Cluttermonkey"... and when you finally kill him, you get the "Important NPC killed, reset." message, while the guy has nothing to do with the plot whatsoever.

He wears a full Daedric armor (save for the helm and boots that beast races cannot wear) and has a cool Dwemer mace which has 0/0 charges, and you can bash with it as much as you want and it never will be depleted.

There's another weird area in Morrowind - the Clutter warehouse, where you fight some Argonian named "Lord Cluttermonkey"... and when you finally kill him, you get the "Important NPC killed, reset." message, while the guy has nothing to do with the plot whatsoever.Of course, keeping in mind that the Clutter warehouse is a test environment, they may have just tested the functionality of the important NPC thing. By the way, Lord Cluttermonkey is Khajiit.

Other objects of interest in that cell: a crate with all armor and a crate with all weapons.

By the way, Lord Cluttermonkey is Khajiit. :skeptic: :skeptic: :skeptic: :skeptic: :skeptic:

Err, no, he was an Argonian.

Different versions of the game, maybe?

Haven't played Morrowind, but I remember my friend telling me that there was some magic resistance thing when using Boots of Blinding Speed, the speed stays, but there's no more blindess. There was probably a ring or something to increase your magic resistance.

There are quite a lot of magic items offering magic resistance and you can make your own as well. Not the biggest fan of the speed bonus - it's a little too quick at times (particularly when playing on my older PC).

Err, no, he was an Argonian.

Different versions of the game, maybe?Nope, no different version. You sir, were correct. Guess my memory isn't as good as I thought it was.

Haven't played Morrowind, but I remember my friend telling me that there was some magic resistance thing when using Boots of Blinding Speed, the speed stays, but there's no more blindess. There was probably a ring or something to increase your magic resistance. Yup, MR only affects the bad stuff, but not the good stuff. So with stacking appropriate items, you could get up to 100% MR and not get blinded at all, but still have the 200 point boost to Speed. I had a similar experience with the Fourth Corner of the House of Troubles (Temple quest), where your blessing reward randomly fortifies and drains four of your abilities at the same time (Sheogarath is a wacko). Nothing went down and I thought I'd just gotten lucky, until I looked at the effect icons. I'd gotten +12 luck and -23 luck, yet my luck was up 5 points. Then I remembered my MR, 70% between the Cuirass of the Savior's Hide and Mara's Blouse, and sure enough, 30% of -23 is about -7, which combined with +12 makes a net +5.

To steer this back to the topic, the token for that pilgrimmage was the Gambolpuddy ( :hahaerr: hehe, Gambolpuddy), a glove that when used, fortified your Agility, Intelligence, Personality, and Luck by 15-30 points for 30 seconds, and drained your Endurance, Strength, Speed, and Willpower by 15-30 points for 30 seconds. Roll 'dem bones! :roll: I think it's almost fortunate that it gets used up as a token, because otherwise you might actually be tempted to use the thing. :shake:

Then there's another Sheogarath creation, the Fork of Horripilation (say that five times fast :shake: ). It's not a pitchfork, it's not a military fork, it's not a fauchard-fork or even a trident. It's a dinner fork. A "short blade" that does 1-2 damage, with 2-3 on thrust, and has a constant effect Drain Magicka 200 points on Self, which means you've got zero magic shortly after you equip it. And you're supposed to kill not a regular netch, but a Giant Netch with this thing. :skeptic: (And before people offer, I already know the loophole.)